Interview - a Straight Guy's perspective

In the short history of this blog, I've interviewed brides, officiants, and gay grooms, but I have yet to give a straight groom a word in edgewise. to correct this oversight, I've enlisted Mr. MC, East Coast Rebecca's "fiance." As everyone knows from East Coast Rebecca's interview, she and Mr. MC throw awesome parties. A ECR and Mr. MC wedding will be a guarantee of a good time so who better to speak for the grooms of the world than the uber-cool Mr. MC.

Ok. Not to get all academic on you, but how has or hasn't the role of a groom changed in our generation? What your role in the wedding? Are there any parts of the wedding that are your territory?

The role of groom has always been dependent on the two most important individuals involved: the bride and the mother of the bride. Our society tends to become more enlightened as things go along (current administration not withstanding), so just as you see more stay-at-home-dads and more diaper-changing stations in men’s rooms, so too you see more and more grooms having a say in the Big Day. And by “more and more” I mean that the meager 2% involvement of our fathers’ generation has skyrocketed to probably 5% today.

Like a lot of grooms the hardest part of my job is already done. I got on my knee (metaphorically), pulled out ring (again, metaphorically) and popped the question. From then on my most major job is quality control. She runs ideas by me and I agree. Truthfully, I’ve said no to a few things, but mostly I’m there as a sounding board for her ideas. I’ve been married before so I see this big day as requiring more input from her than from me and she agrees.

I’m in charge of my suit, the music, making sure the ceremony’s legal (ooh, a reminder I have to do that) and, eventually, a honeymoon. I was part of the make-our-own invitations assembly line and if we can ever afford to go on a honeymoon, I’ll plan that bad boy myself.


Speaking of roles of the wedding, what role will your daughter, Mr. Gander play for the wedding? She's so on it, I can't see her dressed in a poufy Junior bridesmaid outfit.

This is a small wedding. No bridesmaids or groomsmen, no flower girl or ring bearer. Mr. Gander will look stylish but, you’re right, nothing poufy. She is in charge of getting everyone’s picture taken for the guest book. I mean, we have a photographer, that’s done. But we’re going to have a digital camera and printer available and she’s in charge of getting pictures taken and printed and then returning them to people so they can sign them. Then, wham! Instant guestbook with photos. She’ll probably have a team of cousins to help her on her mission.

Like J and I, you and ECR have been together for a long time before any wedding talk came up. Do you think your relationship will change at all?

Yes. Like all married couples we will never have sex again.


What are you looking forward to about the wedding? Also, is there any aspect of the wedding that is particularly stressful or will it be a well oiled machine?

We recently had an engagement party where a bunch of our friends got together (duh, like a party) but it was more intimate than our parties usually are and a lot of our friends met a lot of our friends for the first time and that was really, really fun. So, I’m looking forward to seeing people together for the first time; Our families especially. My folks have never met her folks, so that’s going to be fun. My dad is almost identical to her brother-in-law in some very particular ways and we’re convinced having them in the same place is going to rip a hole in the space-time continuum. And, you know, feeling all that LOVE in the air, the support from friends. Should be very exciting.

As for well-oiled machine: no such thing. Things will go wrong. That’s okay. We’ve got the most supportive audience one could possibly imagine. It’s like you’re starring in the school play and every single person in the audience is your mom. No matter how big an egg you lay, the crowd is convinced you’re perfect. I have no fears. Except traffic. And rain. And ptomaine poisoning. And spontaneous erections. And the McCain/Palin ticket. Not necessarily in that order.

Finally, what would you like the guests to remember about the wedding? How hot we looked.

P.S. I am sad not go be in DC for your half-assed Halloween. I was dying to go as a Toilet Paper Bride.
Yes, Half-Ass Halloween V: Dracula’s Wedding will continue our wedding reception one week later, but with fewer family members and more inappropriate attire. I’m sorry you can’t be there, but perhaps you could dress up as a toilet paper bride at home and you’ll FEEL like you’re there!